Why have we never heard a political candidate talk about the possibility of pupternity leave benefits? Aside from the fact that companies would go out of business and dogs might be adopted, just for the sake of its owner taking time off work, I think it’s a fantastic idea! I’d like to make this happen. After all, I have the experience of having taken a pupternity leave in the past.
My qualifications are clear
I have been known to frantically race through each morning and feed, dress, drop off kids at daycare and school so that I can get to the BART station to grab the coveted very-last-parking-spot. Yes, each day was like the Amazing Race and I won quite often. When I didn’t win, it stunk. But, I am still here, living to tell about it. The commute into the city is an hour each way including the required stop for coffee on my walk up the hill to the office. Incidentally, my office at the time was on a big-ass hill in San Francisco. No matter how many days I climbed that hill, 2,080 times it turns out, and no matter what kind of shape I was in, that hill made me regret my meal from the previous evening.
“Early” meetings started at 9A and the end of the day wasn’t an option until your boss left, sometime after 7P. Like most people, I ate lunch at my desk, and sometimes dinner, only to reverse directions and make my way home in time to kiss the kids goodnight. Thank you to my hubby who always took the afternoon-pickup-dinner parenting shift.
The work culture at X agency was electric, smart, young, fun, creative, eyebrow-raising and incredibly inspiring. I spent eight years working there, and I’d like to think it is where I grew up, in my career. I loved almost every minute of it.
I’ve taken a medical leave in the past
The company I worked for had a beneficial maternity leave policy, and I took advantage of it each of the two times my husband and I welcomed our kids into the world. The California Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) coupled with my seniority at the agency meant I could take significant time off to be with my newborn (both times). My maternity leave was something I wouldn’t trade for anything. Of course, maternity leave is the time where you bond with your baby, but it’s also when you try to figure out just what this parenthood job is and how to adequately do it. By the way, if you figure out these parenthood questions in this lifetime, please do let me know. I’ll gladly contact “The Guinness Book of World Records” for you.
Six years ago we decided to adopt and brought home the most precious little puppy girl, and our lives changed forever. This time around, I vowed it would be different. I immediately put myself on pupternity leave (left my job), and the leg nipping, wire chewing, eat-everything, energetically sleepy, also known as, the cycle of puppyhood began. This new role of pup-mom was just what was needed, but I missed my job too. I wish I could have had both.
Pupternity leave is for real
A brief pause (paws): Before we move any further, let’s get something straight: maternity leave is the time when a woman takes leave before or after childbirth. Pupternity leave in my mind, is a form of maternity leave, only for a dog. There, I said it. I wanted to clear the air before someone pointed out that my dog might be taking time off from work or that I gave birth to a dog.
The benefits of my pupternity leave have been immeasurable, and I can’t recommend it highly enough to those that might choose this path. Our girl (Sadie) was quickly potty trained, learned the rules of the house, and earned the entire family’s adoration. Sadie has brought love, snoring, listening ears, and calm, believe it or not, to our household. Through careful study though, we have determined this Yellow Lab is not a pure-bred after all. Her genetic makeup is equal parts baby harp seal (soft, white hair, big brown eyes), part cat (we have the only Lab known to man who doesn’t like to swim), and part lazy teenager (she sleeps until 11A most days). Had I not been on pupternity leave we might never have known of her condition. Lastly, because I work part-time from home, I have also been able to solidify my status as Alpha. What is not to love about a pupternity leave here?
What office should I run for?
I have yet to identify an office for which I would like to run. But, if I did run for office and either FMLA or a corporation’s leave policy was in my purview, I’d certainly push for instituting a mandatory pupternity leave. All it would take is official recognition that dogs are part of the family too. This designation would then qualify dog-parents for FMLA and eventually pupternity leave. Let’s face it, pupternity leave means less loneliness and more love for all. Bring it!
P.S. I cannot support the notion of caternity leave in any form. No offense to cat lovers, really. Cats are predators by nature. They ignore people who attempt to say hello, or they lie in wait to jump out and scare the crap out of passersby. It’s asinine to expect the government or any company to pay its employees to sit home and attempt to form a friendship through catnip or other means of feline bonding.
P.P.S. A little tip for new cat owners: Catnip doesn’t work on kittens until they are at least six months old. It’s called CATnip for a reason.
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