Why I’ve written my eulogy and you should too

Eulogy for Missy Hunter

Missy was an inspiring woman, daughter, sister, wife, mother, and friend. She lived her life with passion and humor, often at her own expense. Missy was short in stature but made up for that with her huge personality. She graduated college armed with a degree in English and set out to become a writer. However, before she knew it, Missy had spent the majority of her career in analytical roles in advertising and marketing. She only began to pursue a writing career in her late 40s. Her published pieces range in subject matter from fitness, family, humor to reinventing herself after her kids had left the nest.

Missy was a giver and always thought of others and how she could go above and beyond for them. Missy was an athlete whose competitive nature and appetite was sometimes bigger than her bite. This all-or-nothing spirit was passed down to both her kids and she loved to see that. Being physically active was a priority for Missy, so she was usually among the first to raise her hand to swim in a meet, run a half marathon, conquer another triathlon or try something new just for the fun of it. She was feisty, confident, sarcastic, emotional and stubborn. Missy was my go-to partner in crime.

It’s glowing, isn’t it? Wasn’t I perfect? The beauty of creating your own eulogy is that you can make up whatever you want about yourself! A person’s eulogy doesn’t need to point out all of their faults and disappointments. It’s meant to be a celebration of life, a nod to the person and their place in this world. We are all still young. But why not start from the end and live like you are planning your funeral? What would you want to have accomplished when your time has come? Where would you like to go? How would you like to spend your time and with whom? How can you ensure you have no regrets?

Think of Life Experiences rather than a Bucket List

If you are like me, you love writing lists. Lists breed productivity. Plus, they give you a reason to cross things off, such as “nap.” When planning your future (or your end), don’t go to the dull and expected bucket list. Sometimes bucket lists are short, there’s an end to it, and that’s depressing.

• Jump out of a plane with a stranger attached to your back
• Hike the Pacific Crest Trail
• Swim with sharks in South Africa
• Sell cotton candy at a baseball game

Instead, develop a Life Experience List of enormous proportions and continuously add to it.

Here’s how you get there: Start a eulogy. Start several. Just sit down and write out what people might say right now if they needed to say goodbye to you. Now write a tribute to yourself that you’d like to see after you’ve lived a long life. You will see specific themes begin to form in both versions. What shapes your identity? Is it straightforward such as your demographic make-up (sex, race, religion)? Does it list your skills and abilities? Is your eulogy centered around family? Does it touch on where you were born, where you grew up? Is your education or where you work a highlight? Look for themes and start to categorize them into life experiences. Here’s mine:

Life Experience Themes:

• Physical/Athletic Feats
• Adventures that would keep humor and fun top of mind
• Family power
• Do what you love

I’ve got items listed under each theme. Some I’ve crossed off, others still working on. By now, this Life Experience List is mammoth. Further, the goal isn’t to complete the list. Instead, it should be a living, breathing document of experiences I’d like to seek out. These are things I’d like to incorporate into my life in order to bring more balance on a daily basis. This is my way of living in the here and now until it’s time, whenever that may be.

Grab a pen, sit down and start mapping out your future.

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