Tri-lingual in 5 minutes? Say it ain’t so!

I have a college degree, so that qualifies as being highly educated, correct? English was the chosen major because it was the language I learned as a child so how hard could it be? I was good at arguing, ask my parents, so writing an argumentative essay wouldn’t be a stretch. Creative thinking was my specialty; after all, a person master’s bullshitting in high school. Perhaps my favorite part of choosing this as my calling is that there is no ONE answer; you can interpret a passage, poem or punishment, in many different ways. Again, I was qualified. I knew full well what I was getting into by declaring English as my focus in college. Since I graduated, it is safe to say I am fluent in this language. My higher education gave me the title of “tri-lingual.”

In grade school, I had already perfected two other languages.

Learning English was just the icing on the cake. Good gravy, I am so freaking intelligent it scares most people. …And you can be too if you act now, and learn a third, maybe fourth, language. Consider this.

Do you find yourself struggling to make a point and English just isn’t enough to get the job done? Would you prefer yelling in another language? Is it frustrating that students are learning a second language at a younger age; prohibiting you as a parent, to fluently communicate in second-language code with your spouse?

Introducing McLanguage.

Developed by a brother and sister by the last name of McLain while traveling on a road trip in the family station wagon, McLanguage came about from sheer boredom and proved to be useful to communicate, fool the parents, and pass the time. This language could involve including “Mc” before every spoken word. However, we cannot confirm this without the purchase of the full course.

On a horrid date? No need to excuse yourself from the table.

Instead, call your friend right in front of your companion, speak in McLanguage, and make a plan to end that date. Tired of being a non-whisperer, and talking out of the side of your mouth about other people? Take McLanguage lessons, and side-mouth talking is history. Yell McLanguage at high volumes and then speak softly two seconds later. It is that versatile. Speaking McLanguage is a skill that will last forever.

How much would you pay for the incredible McLanguage?

But wait, don’t answer that. We will throw in a review course of Speed Pig Latin with the purchase of McLanguage. Remember slowly speaking Pig Latin to anyone who would indulge you to practice? It’s back and more popular than ever. Only this time around, you’ll learn how to speak Pig Latin at a rapid pace. That’s two unbelievable languages that make communicating painless.

But wait, there’s more.

We also want you to have the new and improved Slangtionary. Slangtionary is multiple languages in one delivered in a very informal tone. This communication brings you closest to being able to converse with your Teen. Using the Slangtionary allows the speaker to sound cool and feel younger at the same time. The benefits are endless! The Slangtionary is a limited time offer as Teen slang changes daily.

How much would you pay for all three items?

To make this offer utterly irresistible, we’ll send you text slang translations. Now, how much would you pay? You get a course of McLanguage mastered in five minutes, a review course of Speed Pig Latin, the notion of the new and improved Slangtionary, as well as the ever-popular text slang translations. All of this can be yours for the low, low, low price of $9.95. Act now, and you can double, even triple the number of languages you speak.

Call 1-800-ginsuknivesareso80s.

That’s 1-800-ginsuknivesareso80s. Call NOW.

McWon’t Mcyou Mcbe Mcthe Mcbest Mcmom
onWay’tay youyay ebay ethay estbbay momcay
Moms is crunk, fo’ shizzle
143M or 459M or 831M

McLanguage

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